Liam finally stands up and mother-fucks the TV. I was impressed, considering how reserved he has been throughout the season, even at live games.
Immediately after the game, his phone started buzzing.
We have tickets to Game 7. I hope we don't have to use them.
LET'S GO PENS!
Boss: You never let me finish. I'm trying to tell you something here.
Me: OK. I'm done. Finish.
Boss: But you never let me finish a sentence. You are always interrupting!
Me: OK. I'm done. Finish.
Boss: I"m trying to tell you something here, and you keep going on, and I think if you heard what I have to say, you wouldn't think....
Me: ....
Boss: ...
Me: I'M DONE. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO SAY.
Boss: That you didn't even listen to me long enough to hear what I was going to tell you.
Me: What do you want to tell me?
Boss: I would tell you if you would just shut up and let me tell you.
Me: I would shut up, but you're not telling me anything.
Boss: Listen, I have to say...
Me: But I...
Boss: See?? You are always interrupting me!!
Me: Really?
Boss: Just get out. GET OUT!
CALL ME, WILL YA?????*
*But not between 1 and 6 tomorrow or after 11 p.m.; Monday is not looking good but Tuesday around lunchtime or after .... no, after 9 on Wednesday is good.... Thursday I'm probably available briefly any time in the morning but if you call me Friday before 6 p.m. I might drive up there and have words with you. Hope to hear from ya!
Zoe didn't have school today, and I haven't been feeling quite right, so I took the day off and dragged her around to various appointments I made to figure out why my blood pressure has been whacked out.
She was relatively well-behaved (and by that, I mean, she didn't kick any of the doctors in the shins), so I let her pick a place to go eat, and she chose, of course, the "tricks place." Japanese grill.
We snagged Jacob from day care and headed to Sapporo. As the cook started the show, I noticed Jacob, with his fork, was imitating everything the cook did. If the cook waved something around, Jacob waved his fork. If the cook used a spatula to spread oil on the grill, Jacob did the same to his high chair tray.
We all got a big kick out of this, me mostly because our other trips to the tricks place seemed to leave Jacob bored. But he was so into it now! He was watching this teenager before us toss shrimp into his hat, flip eggs, drum on sesame seed jars.
The cook sliced a few onions and piled them up. Zoe said, "This is my favorite part!" And then BOOM, he switched off the lights and up went the onions in flames. Jacob was tickled and giggled with glee.
After the cook switched the lights back on, Zoe leaned over to Jacob, and for an instant, my blood ran a little cold: "Don't try this at home, Jacob."
Oh. Dear. God.
From a web site about skydiving that I came across:
Among the most important skydiving gears you must have is a parachute. Nobody will ever be that bold to jump out of a plane, thousands high up without a parachute to back him up.
No amount of mattresses can save your life with the impact of such a fall. But if it will be your first time to skydive, you should definitely consider some professional help before you skydive.
I made chicken broth for the first time today!
I even had cheesecloth ON HAND. It doesn't get more domestic than that. I hope Zoe remembers all the great smells from her childhood and wants nothing more than to drag her family over to her mom's house for dinner every week!
...why Zoe loves her mom.
Zoe must have been instructed to take home this lovely list on Friday, but if I know my daughter, she left it at school out of complete caution, not knowing if her teacher was telling her the truth that Sunday was, indeed, Mother's Day.
It was a fill-out form, and her exact answers are after the ellipses.
10. I love my mom because she reads me... a book.
9. I love my mom because she helps me... lrin how to cook.
8. I love my mom when she makes me laugh by... tell me a joke and tickil me.
7. I love my mom because she taught me how to... cook.
6. I love to hear my mom sing... a soge.
5. I love my mom because she finds time to... play.
4. I know my mom cares because she... play with me and Jacob and she loves me.
3. I know my mom is smart because... she loves me.
2. I love my mom because she works so hard at... taking care of me.
1. I love my mom because she's the best mom ever.
Jacob calls me "Mommy" only when he's borderline mad. He otherwise refers to me as "Ahh? Ahhh?"
"AHHHHHHHH??"
The day started off with us running to get to the baptism of my nephew, Robby. It was an interesting affair, in a non-demonational church, and I didn't melt or catch on fire as probably was expected. I thought about telling Zoe to run up and see if she could catch a little spray in an earnest attempt to protect the innocent, but I decided not to horn in on my brother's gig, as much as it would please my family to have my own children blessed in such a manner.
My sister-in-law Jen, left, my brother, IN A SUIT for the third time in his life, and the godparents.
After such a moving ceremony, the skies cleared and I baptized my tackle in the Mon.
My rod is better than Liam's. (But his reel was likely far superior.)
River fishing rocks.
Do Pittsburgh fish enjoy Canadian fare? Are there no U.S. worms worthy of being refrigerated for weeks on end?
I got a few bites, but with all the river swelling and swift current, it was impossible to snag anything other than a few rocks.
Liam caught... a Liam! Whoa!
I will still try to dedicate my first catch to my beautiful nephew.
Zoe, this morning, gesturing wildly, matter-of-factly: Mommy, I don't feel like myself today. And what I mean by that is that I, myself, am not feeling like myself. Sometimes I get to school and I don't feel like myself. I'm wearing these clothes, and then I don't feel like myself. And what I mean is that I'm not feeling myself. I go to school a lot when I don't feel like myself.
Me, in my head: It's 8-something in the fucking morning. What the fuck... is someone talking right now??? Do I really need to deal with a deep-rooted psychosis right now??
Me, to Zoe: So what do you feel like, honey?
Zoe: Like I want to go home and get new clothes on.
Among the comments on a news story about Virgin Mary apparitions:
Comment 132: Is that to say the cheese sandwiche didn't help that woman the day it was made? each of us get exactly what we need when we need it...maybe even a grilled cheese sandwich is a miracle
Comment 135: There's a fool born every minute, and most of them are on this message board.
I GOT A CUSTODY AGREEMENT TODAY!!!!
Which means no trial... continued harassment... but an enforceable court order and getting to watch Joe's lawyer tell him exactly how this works. I didn't get everything I wanted, but I got enough. For now.
Liam's oldest daughter is making her first communion tomorrow. I have opted out, sadly, because his daughters' mother will be there, and I have both my kids this weekend, and I'm afraid it might turn into a situation that would have me seeing the inside of a hospital in one way or another.
He held a picnic in honor of this accomplishment today, though, and it was great fun for Zoe and Jacob. And I think for everyone else who was there. I hadn't been to South Park since I was in high school, I think.
I came home tired, the kids came home passed out.
I'm a little perplexed at how all of Liam's friends spoke freely of his ex in front of me though... I can only imagine that he's told them that I know all about it, and that I'm cool with it. But it was not just a brief bitchfest; the evening was littered with knocks on his ex, after some of her relatives who attended left. It just didn't stop.
I'm glad Liam has support behind him in friends and family... and it has been there long before I came along. And I don't disagree that his ex is deserving of such ridicule, especially since most of the people in attendance were friends with her before becoming friends with Liam. It just seemed like a strange time to revisit the past, and I'm not so keen on hearing the same stories over and over.
Part of me wants Liam to get past all this, part of me is worried about my own court date Monday. Part of me is glued to my own problems and hearing so much about Liam's glitches is a constant reminder that there may be no light at the end of my tunnel.
The rest of me is going to get my ass to bed so I can CHEER ON THE PENS tomorrow!!!!
Overheard on the Cleveland police scanner:
Dispatcher: "Mother called and said her daughter wants money to buy drugs."
Officer: "I won't give her money either."
Dispatcher: "I don't blame you."
My car has been clacking for a couple of days, so I headed to Jiffy Lube tonight for a top-off. Which in my case usually means a refill and a lecture. After I signed the receipt and headed out to my car, one of the guys who worked on my car came out and asked me if I remembered him.
I hate when this happens!!!! It's like a pop quiz!
It turned out to be Jason, the boy next door to my childhood home, who I grew up with. If I'm not mistaken (sorry Kel), he was the recipient of my sister's first kiss.
It was good to catch up, however briefly, and I was surprised that he embraced me when I learned who he was. This happens to me a good deal. Pittsburgh: The big small town.
I am surprised by the number of people I have run into from my past that have regular old jobs, never attended college, and make a damn good living.
I wonder a lot what I would be if I had taken that route. It kind of breaks my heart that I missed out on having that on so many levels. That sounds a little nutty, but I find people who didn't marry careers they decided on as teens are much happier.
Damn my parents for pushing education!!!
I loved my college days, don't get me wrong. But I didn't "find myself" there. I'm still working on it, and fuck if I don't feel so pigeonholed for not leaving my options open.
Maybe I should have chosen a more viable major. And just stayed around town. And bought a trailer park.
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